How converted are you?

A little boy fell out of bed night after night and woke the household with his frightened crying.
Exasperated his Dad finally scolded, 'Why did you fall out of bed again?'
The little boy, sniffled, 'I stayed too close to where i got in.'.

Conversions happen
Growing up I saw hundreds and hundreds of the then Baby Boomers get 'converted'. They went forward at Billy Graham Crusades, Baptist Youth Rallies, Youth For Christ Meetings, Easter camps, summer camps, May holiday camps, church services and what not.

Many were baptised. Many joined a church. Some became pastors, priests, leaders, missionaries, translators, medical workers, charity workers. Most became office workers, bank clerks, tax agents, plumbers, metal workers, teachers, singles, and nice mums and dads.

Like me, you might be one of them.

Conversions don't go very far
They stopped breaking the law. They stopped living immorally. They stopped dabbling in the occult. They stopped getting drunk. They didn't take drugs. Heck! Some of them even stopped going to dances! (Some even stopped saying Heck.)

The aim seems to have been to get us to become nice – middle class – polite, pleasant and perspicacious. That's a kind of conversion I suppose but is it the real deal? To stop being 'bad' is one thing but to be outrageously 'good' is quite different.

There's a level of conversion to which most 'converts' have never risen. It's in the realm of character and it reveals itself in attitudes, mind-sets, casual conversations, the shows we watch on TV, the comments we make on Facebook, the prides and prejudices we express about refugees, homosexuals, women, men, gun ownership, drug addicts, Muslims
, prostitutes, poor people, homeless people, the music we choose, the things we meditate on in the newspaper and the evening news, the junk we buy and the cars we drive and the homes we live in.

These are nasty days
It's a strategic time to ask how far in you've got

Anyway, to infinity and beyond.
Live long and prosper.

Love –

Colin

Do you believe nonsense?

The Bible says ... (not!) 
People do talk a lot of rubbish. Here are some quasi religious-sounding examples.
'God helps those who help themselves.'
'Cleanliness is next to Godliness.'
'To thine own self be true.'
'Neither a lender nor a borrower be.'
'Money is the root of all evil.'

These are attributed to the Bible but they are a collection from Shakespeare and your mother.

Fey spiritual religious people (even highly paid Christian pastors) are heard to say;
'The Lord told me ... '
'I heard God say ... '
'I wonder what God is trying to say to me.'

Makes me wonder too.

And then there is the ignoramus factor
'This bad thing has happened to you because your grandfather was a Free Mason.'
'You are cursed because your mother went to a seance when she was carrying you.'
'You need deliverance from your father's demons.'

Ignoramus factor?
Yep. Ignorance of the wisdom of Jeremiah and Ezekiel who tell us that the sayings, common in the day such as
'the sins of the fathers are visited on the children', and
'the fathers have eaten sour grapes and the children's teeth are set on edge', were and are rubbish.

Each of them tells us that the sinner who sins will be held responsible for his or her own sins and that is that. If he turns from his sinful ways he will be forgiven and that will be that. If he doesn't he won't and that will be that. If the person's child sins, the parent will not be held responsible for it by God and if the child repents, the child will be forgiven and that will also be that.

Ain't that a relief?

You can read it for yourself here: 
http://bit.ly/1Kmhah9

Anyway, to infinity and beyond.

Live long and prosper.

Love –

Colin

For some people each day presents another panoply of misery. Yes a panoply—a delicious array of insults, dismay, heart break, set backs, pain, punishment, disappointments and despair.

They have my sympathy

In just the last week I've heard of a dad being screamed at in a public car park by an adult daughter for an accidental slight he'd made against someone she knew. It was humiliating. Another had been cruelly dealt with for suggesting she'd babysat her friend's dog for long enough. That was unfair. Yet another had been slandered by a work colleague for incidents the slanderer had only imagined. That was heart breaking. A salesperson was cursed at by a desperate shopper for the company's not having stock on hand to match its advertising. That was embarrassing.

They're all in good company

I have been wading my way through the miserable swamp that is the book of Jeremiah. I've read it before. It hasn't struck me this hard before. It's horrible. For more than fifty years the poor bloke spoke his mind – the mind of God – and poured himself into it. Poured is hardly a good enough description. I mean he waterfalled, cascaded and sea spouted himself into it. Relentlessly.

God forbade him to marry so he was always alone. Colleagues lied about him and denounced his message and  worse, his motives. Kings had him arrested and jailed. The most respectable people in town kidnapped him and dropped him in a cistern up to his neck in slime. He was laughed at, ignored and punished in every conceivable way – just for telling kings and citizens alike to act in mercy, fairness and in honour of God.

And whenever life got a little bit better for him for a day or two, it went down the drain again – only faster and deeper.

Wayne Jackson at The Christian Courier writes that the book of Jeremiah It is 'one of the most thrilling.' I didn't see it quite that way this time around. I just feel so sorry for the guy. Deeply deeply saddened. And although I'd like to think, my lot is nowhere as terrible as his so I should be happy about that I can only think how life is so hard, tough and gnarled sometimes. And that brings me down.

One thing comes through though. Jeremiah didn't give up. I reckon I would have. I am sad to say I need praise, effectiveness, the sense I have done something world-changing with my life, with my time and talent, not to mention a pathetic need for thanks, honours and perhaps a small statue. Jeremiah got none. 

Jackson points out the big learning points from the book. I'm glad he did because on this reading, all I got was a bad case of depression and a good kick up the nether regions about how life isn't about me.

•   God Empowers the Servant,

•   Remember Your Vows

•   God Hates the Superficial

•   True Repentance

•   The High Price of Sin

•   God Will Be Victorious

•   Jesus Is the Only Hope

•   Expect Persecution

•   Judgment Day Will Come

Anyhoodle. I hope this hasn't sent you into useless depression, and gives you a chance to say, Life looks terrible for a lot of people but God has a bigger view. I don't get it, but I'll go with it, come what may.

Anyway, to infinity and beyond.

Live long and prosper

Love

Colin

Just for a change, here's something The Lovely Christine wrote for the South Australian Baptist News. She writes for women so I changed a few bits to be more inclusive.

FREE PDF OF TONGUE QUOTES Hit this email address and I'll get around to sending you the PDF of my quote cards on the tongue in a few days.   (Don't want to over promise.) You can import them to your iPhone, iPad or any other thingy and click through them while you're waiting to go into a meeting, go home, meet the boss, visit a difficult customer, where you might trip over your own tongue by not keeping it still.

They have my sympathy In just the last week I've heard of a dad being screamed at in a public car park by an adult daughter for an accidental slight he'd made against someone she knew. It was humiliating. Another had been cruelly dealt with for suggesting she'd babysat her friend's dog for long enough. That was unfair. Yet another had been slandered by a work colleague for incidents the slanderer had only imagined. That was heart breaking. A salesperson was cursed at by a desperate shopper for the company's not having stock on hand to match its advertising. That was embarrassing. They're all in good company I have been wading my way through the miserable swamp that is the book of Jeremiah. I've read it before. It hasn't struck me this hard before. It's horrible. For more than fifty years the poor bloke spoke his mind – the mind of God – and poured himself into it. Poured is hardly a good enough description. I mean he waterfalled, cascaded and sea spouted himself into it. Relentlessly. God forbade him to marry so he was always alone. Colleagues lied about him and denounced his message and  worse, his motives. Kings had him arrested and jailed. The most respectable people in town kidnapped him and dropped him in a cistern up to his neck in slime. He was laughed at, ignored and punished in every conceivable way – just for telling kings and citizens alike to act in mercy, fairness and in honour of God. And whenever life got a little bit better for him for a day or two, it went down the drain again – only faster and deeper. Wayne Jackson at The Christian Courier writes that the book of Jeremiah It is 'one of the most thrilling.' I didn't see it quite that way this time around. I just feel so sorry for the guy. Deeply deeply saddened. And although I'd like to think, my lot is nowhere as terrible as his so I should be happy about that I can only think how life is so hard, tough and gnarled sometimes. And that brings me down. One thing comes through though. Jeremiah didn't give up. I reckon I would have. I am sad to say I need praise, effectiveness, the sense I have done something world-changing with my life, with my time and talent, not to mention a pathetic need for thanks, honours and perhaps a small statue. Jeremiah got none. Jackson points out the big learning points from the book. I'm glad he did because on this reading, all I got was a bad case of depression and a good kick up the nether regions about how life isn't about me. God Empowers the Servant, Remember Your Vows God Hates the Superficial True Repentance The High Price of Sin God Will Be Victorious Jesus Is the Only Hope Expect Persecution Judgment Day Will Come Anyhoodle. I hope this hasn't sent you into useless depression, and gives you a chance to say, Life looks terrible for a lot of people but God has a bigger view. I don't get it, but I'll go with it, come what may. Anyway, to infinity and beyond. Live long and prosper Love Colin

I had a bit taken off my tongue

Hit this email address and I'll get around to sending you the PDF of my quote cards on the tongue in a few days.   (Don't want to over promise.) You can import them to your iPhone, iPad or other thingy and click through them while you're wising to go into a meeting, go home, meet the boss, visit a difficult customer, where you might trip over your own tongue by not keeping it still.

The surgeon said ... 'You must have bitten your tongue at some time and a lump has formed. I'll take if off for you.' 'Will it hurt?', I asked, in my sad little whiny voice. 'It might be a bit sore for a couple of days.' 'OK, then.' 'I'll put you to sleep so you won't feel a thing.' L I A R,   L I A R   P A N T S   O N   F I R E! It hurt like all get out and I couldn't speak English for a week – or swallow, or spit or chew, and even drinking custard through a straw made me dribble down my shirt. I told him he should change his bedside manner. I said he should stop trying to be nice and say it how it really is. Mind you that has got me into all the trouble I've ever managed to create! People are funny I gave a prescription for pain killers to the woman at the pharmacy also handing her a  note saying I couldn't speak because of a tongue operation. She wrote me a note back! I was in too much pain to laugh. it did make me think about 140 quotes about the tongue from a few years  back. Here are a few. Proverbs 11:12 A man who lacks judgement derides his neighbour, but a man of understanding holds his tongue  Proverbs 12:14 From the fruit of his lips a man is filled with good things as surely as the work of his hands reward him.  Proverbs 12:18 Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.  Proverbs 10:8: The wise in heart accept commands, but a chattering fool comes to ruin.  Proverbs 12:23  A prudent man keeps his knowledge to himself, but the heart of a fool bursts out folly.  I recommend silence, if only for a week. It makes you feel wise, sen if you're not.  Anyway, to infinity and beyond. Live long and prosper Love Colin

South Australian locals who work in sales should attend this seminar:

It's next Tuesday 6th May, so get in on the Early Bird price before April 30 and save $100. Here's what i will teach you. Show up! You will ‘get’ a formula for success in sales so you win all the business you can: 3CA=CR.  Grow up! Understand what you are up against in this snappy online sales environment and win back your share of sales. Shut up! 4 selling styles and how to sell without so much talk, talk, talk. Listen up! 8 questions to find out what your prospect really wants. Speak up! When it is your turn to speak, use language dripping with all 7 benefits for your prospect – yet without being smarmy. Sell up! Get your attitude and language right about add-on sales and selling more.  Ask me about the date and the fee and the place. and I will send you the brochure

I gave up opinions for Lent. I think I will keep it up It's been quite a discipline, although a lot easier than giving up chocolate or coffee. I don't imbibe in the demon drink so that wasn't hard to give up. I don't do a lot of dairy or meat so it wouldn't have been hard to give those up. I like coffee and chocolate and they have less affect on me than opinions so I have been glad to be done with them. Having opinions upsets my stomach a lot more than coffee and chocolate. My opinions wind me up, get me agitated, surly, make me sullen, grumpy, jumpy, argumentative and moody. Giving opinions leaves a nastier taste in my mouth than coffee and chocolate.  When I give my opinion I have to live with the fact that I usually didn't know what I was talking about and have got a fact or a story half right and mostly wrong all at the same time. It's easier to recover from not having mouthed off about anything I wasn't sure was a fact, a joke or a self-confessed fiction. Your opinions affect me even worse.  The other day someone decided to graffiti the fences of my feeble mind with their opinions about Israel, Jews, George(s) Bush, Sri Lanka, the US economy, Tony Abbott, asylum seekers, Collingwood, public spending, bike lanes, air fares, spies, retirement age, religion, private school education and three conspiracy theories about Flight 370,  all in the space of about 30 minutes. The individual got away scot free. I remained bruised, battered and left with a mental clean up that lasted 72 hours. Try it I repeat form last time: Finally, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.(Philippians 4:8) Anyway, to infinity and beyond. Live long and prosper Love Colin

I gave up opinions for Lent.

I think I will keep it up

It's been quite a discipline, although a lot easier than giving up chocolate or coffee. 

I don't imbibe in the demon drink so that wasn't hard to give up.

I don't do a lot of dairy or meat so it wouldn't have been hard to give those up.

I like coffee and chocolate and they have less affect on me than opinions so I have been glad to be done with them.

Having opinions upsets my stomach a lot more than coffee and chocolate.

My opinions wind me up, get me agitated, surly, make me sullen, grumpy, jumpy, argumentative and moody.

Giving opinions leaves a nastier taste in my mouth than coffee and chocolate.

When I give my opinion I have to live with the fact that I usually didn't know what I was talking about and have got a fact or a story half right and mostly wrong all at the same time. It's easier to recover from not having mouthed off about anything I wasn't sure was a fact, a joke or a self-confessed fiction.

Your opinions affect me even worse.

The other day someone decided to graffiti the fences of my feeble mind with their opinions about Israel, Jews, George(s) Bush, Sri Lanka, the US economy, Tony Abbott, asylum seekers, Collingwood, public spending, bike lanes, air fares, spies, retirement age, religion, private school education and three conspiracy theories about Flight 370,  all in the space of about 30 minutes. The individual got away scot free. I remained bruised, battered and left with a mental clean up that lasted 72 hours.

Try it

I repeat form last time: Finally, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.(Philippians 4:8)

Anyway, to infinity and beyond.

Live long and prosper

Love

Colin